Saturday 24 April 2010

Avocado on Everything

This afternoon I am mostly watching Matthew Hayden pretend that the semi-final of a major T/20 competition is in fact catching practice for the fielders... and apparently India bloody well needs it. Oh, no, there he goes. Useless heap of Aussie. This would be an awful lot better with added beer garden.

I don't remember off hand whether or not I've previously been dull enough to mention it here, but since I returned from Aus I've been trying to eat less meat, and for me that means less bacon (cutting out chicken would mean my death within weeks, and I didn't eat beef or lamb anyway). Unfortunately, last week I headed down to a local bakery in hopes of finding a replacement source of butter pies since the deli unaccountably stopped selling them, and though it turns out that they do make 'em (fresh and, I've since discovered, pretty bloody well, so that might be a stop on the next here-to-town pub crawl, if Doktorb's reading) I had arrived much too early, and none were ready... but, of course, bacon was being fried right there over the counter, and freshly baked bread was being brought out, so, in the absence of alternatives, I relapsed. And it was good.

Since then I've been back on the bacon, so to speak. Mostly I look on this as an opportunity to eat more avocado, however. Yesterday's attempted BLAT (BLT with avocado, something that pretty much sustained me when I lived within walking distance of the St.Kilda Galleon) fell foul of a lettuce shortage, and so with the substitution of rocket salad became, I suppose, a BRAT, at least until I realised that a tomato shortage was hot on the heels of the lettuce situation, and a finely sliced red pepper brought into being a BRAP. Definitely the best thing I've ever made, for what little that's worth. Moral of the story, Chiv's adventures with food do not make interesting reading.

Lesson learned.

In other thrilling news, the recycling bin is full, and it's not even the weekend, yet. I understand that the Tories have a bajillion pounds to squander on burying people who'll never vote for them -and have told them so directly- in phonecalls and leaflets, but who the fuck is giving UKIP money to burn in similar fashion?

On the impending election... we're told by the 'free' (expensive) press that the process of creating a coalition government would cause the markets to panic, and this would be bad for the economy. Obviously this is an over-simplified nonsense they're trying to feed us. Some people try to argue it down to size. Fair enough. However, I say we respond in kind. If 'they' panic, it's obvious that they did it on purpose in hopes of influencing the democratic process. Thus they are opposed to true British democracy. Thus they are declared enemies of the British people. Thus we tear the skin off their faces and feed it to them. End of motherloving problem. Or just tell the Queen that they're enemies of the people, and that unless she uses some of her powers we're going to finally take them away from her. In any event, wankers lose their heads, everyone else benefits.

I'm watching Empire Records, and it's almost as bad as I remember. But I'm still going to watch the rest of it.